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[glowsferatu]

If Youve Come This Far I Doubt You Cant Guess What To Do From Here
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[lastnerv]

it wasnt like that i didnt like him just for

i mean

it sort of was but

i cant really



its hard to put words to this after youve killed someone before okay lets leave it at that and talk about literally anything else

[glowsferatu]

the things weve known and the people we are sometimes just happen to be incredibly fucked up
nothing we can do to help it

so
you missed ashiahs birthday
i really need a better word for the occasion that doesnt imply birth

[lastnerv]

damn i officially owe her a present then

also i guess you could just call it her wriggling day? especially since shes extra wriggly

not that im trying to tell you how to use your culture or anything in fact forget i said anything

[glowsferatu]

im already using wriggling day to measure alternian time
as an example my ninth wriggling day was last november but my twentieth "birth"day is this coming may
i mostly use "birthday" for convenience because terrans understand what im talking about without having to additionally explain anything
im just wondering if i can do that with more accurate terminology

is hatchday too awkward

[lastnerv]

not any more awkward than sticking any other word in front of day

besides you already know my birthday opinions

[glowsferatu]

oh yes i remember in great detail how blah blah blah something about nihilism and that celebrating anything positive is just awful
actually i cant remember if that was you or karkat
probably both

[lastnerv]

dont lump me in with that guy

[His only experiences with Karkat weren't the best.]

[glowsferatu]

[ She just remembers the time Shinji showed up in Heropa for a hot second, promptly ignored her, and started a conversation with Karkat while he was spiraling. The two of them together would have been an inescapable pit of despair. ]

you two had a lot in common actually
not the least that i love you both dearly
but your temperaments were very similar
he just had the volume turned higher

[lastnerv]

that probably says a lot about your taste in people you care about you know

not that im one to talk

[glowsferatu]

maybe i just care about people who wont care about themselves

[lastnerv]

luckily you have more than enough caring to go around huh

not that im complaining (right now) as long as you spend some of it on yourself too

[glowsferatu]

im doing fine
ive gotten a lot better at taking care of myself over the last year
nothing to worry about there

[ You know, doing the right thing for not necessarily the right reasons, as she tends to do. ]

[lastnerv]

you say that like its possible for me to stop worrying

is the studio still in the same place i can stop by after i check out my new apartment (maurtia falls so ive now lived in all three cities how exciting)

[glowsferatu]

we just got there before you left
we werent going to move again after that
personally ive decided to skip de chima in my yearly move to another porter city
it can probably wait until i either no longer have roommates i like or ashiahs too big to live in these houses

[lastnerv]

not going to lie i forgot de chima even existed i dont think ive ever been there

oh thats a good point whats the plan for when ashiah gets

you know

how shes gonna get

[glowsferatu]

well between when i first recognized it could become an issue and now ive grown into a considerable degree of affluence
for the first time in my life i not only have more than enough to get by comfortably
but more than i know how to spend

so my original plan to find a place in the forest with nice soil thats easily dug up and retire into hermitage
i could probably have a large house built with her specifically in mind

[lastnerv]

being a hermit sounds like a great plan to me

im going to steal that idea from you

[glowsferatu]

shinji ikari dont you dare

[lastnerv]

kidding!

i mean i couldnt even afford a shack in the woods right now

[glowsferatu]

what was it you were saying before about jokes needing to strain belief to properly count

[lastnerv]

im not THAT bad anymore




right?

[glowsferatu]

youve certainly come a long way from when i first knew you
but i dont know that youre quite there just yet

[lastnerv]

its a process

im still figuring everything

but ill try to make my jokes more obvious in the future like "hey kanaya should I start typing in my blood color or is that culturally insensitive"

[glowsferatu]

of course i know its a process
im not faulting you in any way for being in the midst of the process
i dont think any of us actually complete the process until we finally die

also you might be surprised how often i have seen someone genuinely and sincerely say that
not that i think you would

[lastnerv]

i lost my humanity and merged with what i think was god that kind of counts as dying right?

and im probably not surprised who doesnt love copying alien cultures

besides what would i even do with light blue text