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oh yes i remember in great detail how blah blah blah something about nihilism and that celebrating anything positive is just awful
actually i cant remember if that was you or karkat
probably both

dont lump me in with that guy

[His only experiences with Karkat weren't the best.]

[ She just remembers the time Shinji showed up in Heropa for a hot second, promptly ignored her, and started a conversation with Karkat while he was spiraling. The two of them together would have been an inescapable pit of despair. ]

you two had a lot in common actually
not the least that i love you both dearly
but your temperaments were very similar
he just had the volume turned higher

that probably says a lot about your taste in people you care about you know

not that im one to talk

maybe i just care about people who wont care about themselves

luckily you have more than enough caring to go around huh

not that im complaining (right now) as long as you spend some of it on yourself too

im doing fine
ive gotten a lot better at taking care of myself over the last year
nothing to worry about there

[ You know, doing the right thing for not necessarily the right reasons, as she tends to do. ]

you say that like its possible for me to stop worrying

is the studio still in the same place i can stop by after i check out my new apartment (maurtia falls so ive now lived in all three cities how exciting)

we just got there before you left
we werent going to move again after that
personally ive decided to skip de chima in my yearly move to another porter city
it can probably wait until i either no longer have roommates i like or ashiahs too big to live in these houses

not going to lie i forgot de chima even existed i dont think ive ever been there

oh thats a good point whats the plan for when ashiah gets

you know

how shes gonna get

well between when i first recognized it could become an issue and now ive grown into a considerable degree of affluence
for the first time in my life i not only have more than enough to get by comfortably
but more than i know how to spend

so my original plan to find a place in the forest with nice soil thats easily dug up and retire into hermitage
i could probably have a large house built with her specifically in mind

being a hermit sounds like a great plan to me

im going to steal that idea from you

shinji ikari dont you dare

kidding!

i mean i couldnt even afford a shack in the woods right now

what was it you were saying before about jokes needing to strain belief to properly count

im not THAT bad anymore

right?

youve certainly come a long way from when i first knew you
but i dont know that youre quite there just yet

its a process

im still figuring everything

but ill try to make my jokes more obvious in the future like "hey kanaya should I start typing in my blood color or is that culturally insensitive"

of course i know its a process
im not faulting you in any way for being in the midst of the process
i dont think any of us actually complete the process until we finally die

also you might be surprised how often i have seen someone genuinely and sincerely say that
not that i think you would

i lost my humanity and merged with what i think was god that kind of counts as dying right?

and im probably not surprised who doesnt love copying alien cultures

besides what would i even do with light blue text

revel in the gimmick i imagine

anyway i think your question illustrates the important difference between dying and being dead
the inbetweens dont really count in that context
we still have to continue unliving

youre one to talk youre an expert on unliving

thats exactly why i know what im talking about shinji

ill have to accept your vampiric wisdom then

except for the parts about blood drinking

oh of course except for the part i obviously know best from experience
yeah just leave out all that useful knowledge that people should know
what happens when someone bites you and suddenly youre hungry but cant sate yourself
i bet youll be sorry then

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lastnerv - 2017-03-22 23:31 (UTC) - Expand

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glowsferatu - 2017-03-24 04:16 (UTC) - Expand