glowsferatu | IC CONTACT

ROSE SAID SOMETHING TO THE SAME EFFECT.
MAYBE I AM SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME ALONE... LAST WEEK I SPENT FOUR HOURS PUTTING MY MOVIES IN ORDER OF HOW MANY JOKES WERE CRACKED VERSUS HOW HUMOROUS THEY ACTUALLY WERE.
I HAD MICROWAVE MAC AND CHEESE.

so youre eating regularly
but hardly eating well
you and ruka should visit some time so i can be sure youre actually eating something of substance
you need something more than skin to hang from your bones

WE USED TO EAT WELL!
IT'S JUST THAT WE HAVE LESS MONEY NOW...
I LOST ALL MY CLIENTS WHEN I PORTED OUT, SO I'M HAVING TROUBLE FINDING AS MANY WORKING HOURS.

then maybe consider mentioning it sooner
remember that my caste has never been psychic
so give me a grocery list im buying you food

DAMMIT KANAYA
OK, FINE.
FAR BE IT FROM ME TO TURN DOWN FREE FOOD.
I SHOULD PROBABLY ASK RUKA WHAT SHE WANTS THOUGH...
SHE DOESN'T LET ME COOK ON THE STOVE UNLESS SHE SUPERVISES. WHAT AM I, SIX?

i dont know id probably want to see you cook before i let you loose as well
just from imagining a steady stream of sound and fury pouring from the kitchen
no one wants to risk a war zone in their own home
like the key ingredient of a recipe for disaster

OK HOW ABOUT I COOK YOU UP A STEAMING BATCH OF SHUT THE FUCK UP
I'M PERFECTLY CAPABLE OF USING THE KITCHEN *WITHOUT* CAUSING UNTOLD DISASTER.
I ONLY BROKE THE MICROWAVE ONCE.

well yes shut the fuck up is a dish i could consume in some conceivable version of this conversation
but on the other hand i dont think im particularly hungry
as im preoccupied by my current bafflement at how a microwave could even be misused to an extent that leaves it broken

YOU KNOW THOSE UNNECESSARILY FANCY PLATES WITH THE METALLIC EDGING? LIKE GOLD SWIRLS AND SHIT?

so you not only felt that exposure to the energies from the microwaves output would be appropriate for the finer dinnnerware
but you also felt the same when metallic elements were present
im sorry karkat but i dont think i can blame her at all
you should maybe be grateful that your entry to the kitchen hasnt been barred entirely
thats probably what i would do

KANAYA I WON'T DENY THAT IT WAS STUPID
OK, IT WAS INCREDIBLY STUPID. IT'S NOT LIKE I HAD A WHOLE LOT OF EXPERIENCE WITH FINER DINNERWARE. AS IF I EVER GAVE A SHIT ABOUT OWNING SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
PAST KARKAT DID SOMETHING DUMB! WOW, WHAT ELSE IS NEW.
AND I'LL TELL YOU HOW PAST THIS PARTICULAR PAST KARKAT IS. I WAS SIX. IT WAS OVER A YEAR AGO!
I THINK MY FULL KITCHEN RIGHTS SHOULD BE RESTORED BY NOW.

there is no existing legal precedence for kitchen rights
but one may at times be bestowed with revocable kitchen privileges
and a privilege is earned through an extended period of demonstrable diligence
whether that requirement has been satisfied is at the discretion of your probationary officer
im inclined to trust her judgement

OH MY GOD, IT WAS A BROKEN MICROWAVE, NOT A MURDER SCENE
YOU KNOW WHAT, I DON'T EVEN CARE. PUT ME ON PROBATION OR IN FOOD JAIL OR WHATEVER.
LET'S CHANGE THE SUBJECT BEFORE THIS CONVERSATION GETS TOO DUMB FOR ME TO HANDLE.
SINCE WE'RE TALKING ABOUT FOOD
ARE YOU HUNGRY?

[ oh. oh. ]

i could eat
if the eating we are discussing is the eating i think it is

IT WOULD PROBABLY BE MORE ACCURATE TO CALL IT DRINKING.

well it is nominally rainbow drinking
only without the rainbows anymore
i feel i should probably start calling myself a red and more different red drinker

THAT SOUNDS PRETTY STILTED THOUGH.
AND IT'S NOT LIKE YOU WOULDN'T BE DRINKING RAINBOWS IF YOU COULD.

i can dream of rainbows all i like
but all i have is and probably will be red and that other red

yours is the "red" in case you were wondering

SO
MINE REALLY TASTES DIFFERENT?
IT DOESN'T TASTE LIKE HUMAN BLOOD AT ALL?

theyre like night and day
human blood is too salty and bitter
ive had much worse and it gets the job done but its more of a necessity than a choice
rose tries eating different things to see if it will affect the flavor and i humor her yes
but the honest truth is any change is almost imperceptible

and dont you dare repeat that to anyone not even ruka
rose tries far harder than i deserve and i appreciate every moment of it
i will drink her weird-tasting blood to the day i die for good

yours though
its sweet to the degree of an after-dinner delicacy
a sort of richness you almost fear might rot your teeth
karkat as far as im concerned you bleed literal liquid candy

[ It is a weird conversation, for sure. A year ago he can't see himself allowing it to progress even this far. A year ago he wouldn't have let her feed off of him to begin with. He supposes this means he trusts her fully, more than he did in the beginning, even. ]

HUH
I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHY I EXPECTED ANYTHING ELSE, REALLY. OR WHAT I WAS EXPECTING AT ALL.
IT'S JUST HARD TO IMAGINE SOMEONE SAMPLING MY BLOOD AND NOT ERUPTING WITH PROJECTILE VOMIT LIKE A GODDAMN GEYSER
POSSIBLY NEEDING TO BE RUSHED TO THE HOSPITAL FOR FOOD POISONING.
BUT CANDY? OF COURSE IT'S CANDY. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE PEOPLE REFERRED TO MY BLOOD AS "CANDY RED"? HELL, I'M PRETTY SURE "CANDY SWILL" USED TO BE THE STANDARD BLOOD-RELATED INSULT, FOR ME.
HOW, UH
HOW DOES IT COMPARE TO OTHER TROLLS?

[ Validate him tell him he tastes the best VALIDATE HIM ]

well i mean
its no tyrian
but god what is
tyrian is so robust and just
basically wow
i would say that comparatively yours is considerably sweeter
as for the others its really been too long since ive had the opportunity that i cant really trust my memory to accurately describe them
except that eridans was really fishy in an unpleasant way
bias might have made it taste worse than it really was but wherever the truth lies it just wasnt any good

[ That is not the answer he wanted, and it leaves him disappointed, but he supposes he shouldn't have expected much better. "Better than human blood" is probably something he should be grateful for.

It would just be nice to be on top for once. Even if it is the top of the menu. ]

OK AGAIN, NOT SURE WHAT I WAS EXPECTING THERE.
I MEAN BEING BETTER THAN HUMANS IS A GIVEN, BUT. WELL, YOU KNOW.
AND ERIDAN TASTING BAD IS A GIVEN TOO. I HAVE TASTED HIS BLOOD TOO.
GRANTED, ALL BLOOD TASTES FUCKING DISGUSTING TO ME, BUT I REMEMBER HIS BEING PARTICULARLY REVOLTING.

Edited 2014-11-02 10:47 (UTC)

yes im sure you absolutely hated it

also i think
gamzees might have been
i dont even know how to describe it
undesirably intoxicating
if you ever drank it you had better prepare yourself to be a useless piece of shit all day
because youll be utterly incapable of any alternative activity

i feel like its a safe assumption to recall equius as having a strong flavor
but im not sure i actually sampled his blood before
the odor put me off
the rest of them werent really notable
they were blood and they were edible
i think that says a lot

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